“At one point I was the hopeful romantic who would stay out till 4: 00 A.M. every morning, worried that if I went home, I’d miss that magical, amazing woman who showed up at the bar at 3: 35 A.M. After many late nights and brutal mornings, though, I realized that most amazing, magical women don’t walk into a bar at 3: 35 A.M. They’re usually in bed by that hour.”
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