“He asked, 'Tell me right now, Lorelai, why aren't you in school?' and I tried to think of something. Some lie that would make sense, but I couldn't. All I could think was that yesterday I had a boyfriend who loved me and today I didn't, and I started to cry. I just sat there like an idiot, bawling. And finally, after what seemed like forever, I managed to control myself a little bit and I calmed down and I waited. I waited for him to yell at me, to punish me, to ground me forever. To tell me how disappointed he was in me, and nothing came. And finally I got up enough courage to look up at him, and he was standing there with with a pretzel. A giant pretzel covered in mustard.”
More from Lauren Graham
“Is that a llama with a hammer?”
“Mom, I'm on my feet I'm not destitute. I've just got a little financial trouble and two…”
“Seduce me with The Sound and the Fury.”
“I think I'll just try and get along with you and trust you.”