“Kathryn: The parental units called while you were out.
Sebastian: How IS your gold-digging, whore of a mother enjoying Bali?
Kathryn: She suspects your impotent, alcoholic father is diddling the maid.
Sebastian: Good.”
More from Roger Kumble
“Relationships seem too distracting. I'd rather concentrate on my studies.”
“People shouldn't experience the act of love until they are in love.”
“How can someone so charming be so manipulative?”
“He took down my pants and he started writing the alphabet but he was writing it with his…”