“I am a prickly gay man. And not just because I fell into a cactus while stealing apples from a botanical garden.”
More from Sam Means
“Hey, can I borrow a cup of flour? Some white kids outside want cocaine...”
“Some of my best statues are of Indians.”
“Professor Rick: Jason just got a callback for Hamilton so we need you to cover his shift.…”
“Kimmy Schmidt: You look bright-eyed and bushy-tailed. Jacqueline Voorhees: No, I got that…”