“Two goldfish are in a tank. One looks at the other and says, ‘You know how to drive this thing?’”— Unknown, thoughtcatalog.com
“I went in to a pet shop. I said, ‘Can I buy a goldfish?’ The guy said, ‘Do you want an aquarium?’ I said, ‘I don’t care what star sign it is.’”— Thought Catalog, thoughtcatalog.com
“Little Tim was in the garden filling in a hole... when his neighbor peered over the fence. Interested in what the cheeky-faced youngster was up to, he politely asked, ‘Whatcha doing, Tim?’ ‘My goldfish died,’ replied the boy tearfully, without looking up. ‘And I’ve just buried him.’ The neighbor was…”— ZeekOwl91, reddit.com