We know that people are complicated and have a mixture of flaws and talents and sins. So why do we pretend that we don’t?
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Quotes tagged ‘Shaming’
Princess Elizabeth: Is it word from Richard? Lady Margaret: He's using you, you fool, to shame Henry and rob men from his side, but you're so vain you think he loves you. Princess Elizabeth: He does love me, you spiteful— Lady Margaret: You're a whore. You are monstrous in the eyes of God for what y…
Even making a valid point doesn't warrant using shame or intentionally putting someone on the spot in front of other people.
You cannot shame or belittle people into changing. This means we can't use self-hate to lose weight, we can't shame ourselves into becoming better parents and we can't belittle ourselves or our families into becoming who we need them to be. Putting people on the 'loser board' doesn't work. Shame cor…
Honesty that's motivated by shame, anger, fear or hurt is not 'honesty.' It's shame, anger fear or hurt disguised as honesty.
One of the most important benefits of reaching out to others is learning that the experiences that make us feel the most alone are actually universal experiences.
You might argue that Ron is a batterer and that any language that softens or obscures this fact leaves him less accountable for his actions, but Ron will be more likely to accept responsibility and feel remorse if he can view himself as more than a batterer. For people to look squarely at their harm…
Are we using shame as punishment because we think it will foster real change in people? Or are we shaming others because it feels good to make people suffer when we are in fear, anger, or judgment?
The time has come to explore the possibility that we are safer in a world where people aren't mired in shame.
It didn't take very long for me to reach the conclusion that there is nothing positive about shame. In any form, in any context and through any delivery system, shame is destructive. The idea that there are two types, healthy shame and toxic shame, did not bear out in any of my research.