“I’m in a fog and even though I feel like I’m living a good, authentic life, I spend a lot of my life numb. There’s this sleepwalk I do where it’s like I’m under a layer of ice and I slump through the day without any real inner dialogue. It’s like being dead on your feet. Or stuffed with cotton. And then it’s not. The other half of the time the world is clear and I remember everything and my mind is alive. That’s when I can socialize and type letters and make plans and deal with the changing terrain. The rest of the time, I’m pretty worthless.”