“Martin Mucklowe: I got a story to tell you. Last Sunday, right, down at the carvery; Sandra's sitting opposite me with the kids. On the left hand side is my mother-in-law, on the right hand side is me sister-in-law. Then I feels a hand going down my pants. I looks down; it's only the sister in law, yeah.

Dan Greaves: Shut up!

Martin Mucklowe: Yeah, she's got the old fella out. She's givin' a good old tuggin'. I blow my beans!”