“[To Jay Leno] I've been waiting back stage for an hour and a half. Waiting for you to get through your funny car bits.”
More from Don Rickles
“Hollywood has changed. It's not glamorous like the old days. Last time my wife and I went…”
“Political correctness? In my humor, I never talk about politics. I was never much into all…”
“Hello, dummy!”
“I've got an accountant who's been with me forty years. If he makes a mistake, he dies.”