“Bring joy to the world, it's the thing to do, but the world does not revolve around you.

Don't be a jerk. Be nice to babies and animals. Old folks, too. 'Cause that's how you'd like them to treat you! Use turn signals. Don't screen my calls. Don't you wreck the house when you deck the halls.

Spit your gum where it won't wind up on my shoe. Squeeze toothpaste from the bottom of the tube. Don't be a jerk.

It's Christmas! It's Christmas! When others are talking, never interrupt. Don't put people down or leave the toilet seat up.

'Tis the season to be jolly, not jerky!”