“Welcome very, very, very, much, Morton. I guess it was just our luck that you were stopped today as you were driving through town and it was the police chief's idea, and a pretty good one I think, to have you on the show because, well, it occurred to him that many Fernwooders or Fernwoodians or Fernies—whatever they're calling themselves these days—um, have actually never seen a real-live Jew before.”