MOM: *drops small piece of cake on floor*

MOM: Oh no.

ME: I'll eat it.

MOM: MAUREEN THE FLOOR IS CONTAMINATED RULE OF NURSING THE FLOOR IS CONTAMINATED,

ME: *grabs cake*

MOM: *lunges, pins arm to table*

ME: *gets hand to mouth*

MOM: MAUREEN IT IS CONTAMINATED

ME: I die.

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