“If not for that recital and that burger, I might not have ended up on the doorstep of a drunk, twenty-one year old girl. That’s not just a series of coincidences, it’s destiny. And I never doubted you were mine. And never doubt that all I want, forever and always, is for you to be happy.”
More from Micah Schraft
“Well, I didn't see a penis today, but I definitely saw a big dick.”
“I'm a piece of shit, and shit stinks.”
“You know what happens when you burn a bridge? You gotta learn to swim. Or fly.”
“You're a deranged prick. You've never loved anyone in your repulsive life.”