“Luke Duke: [Uncle Jesse takes a big gulp of moonshine while being pursued by the police]…”

“Uncle Jesse: You know why tornadoes and blondes are so much alike? Luke Duke: No. Uncle…”

“You know what happens when a politician takes Viagra? He gets taller.”

“Luke Duke: You thinkin’ about throwin’ that? Uncle Jesse: Oh, I’m gonna throw it...I was…”