“Distract yourself. You gotta make money. You can’t have emotions and make money. Just keep a blank stare on your face. Do as you’re told. Then one day, you have a heart attack. If you’re lucky, you go clean.”— Pete Holmes, Oren Brimer, Artie Lange, Artie Lange, imdb.com
“I want to die peacefully in my sleep like my grandfather, not screaming in terror like his passengers.”— Jack Handey, reddit.com