“Why did the snowman suddenly smile? He could see the snow-blower coming.”— Unknown, thoughtcatalog.com
“How are Kentucky Fried Chicken and a woman the same? Once you take away the legs and the breasts, you’re left with one greasy box to put your bone in.”— Unknown, thoughtcatalog.com
“Why does Miss Piggy douche with honey? Because Kermit likes his pork sweet and sour.”— Unknown, thoughtcatalog.com
“What did one broke hooker say to the other? Can you lend me ten bucks ‘til I’m on my back again?”— Unknown, thoughtcatalog.com
“What does a slut say when her daughter asks how to spell ‘penis’? I wish you’d asked me last night, when it was on the tip of my tongue….”— Unknown, thoughtcatalog.com
“What’s the real definition of a male chauvinist pig? A man who hates every bone in a woman’s body...except his.”— Unknown, thoughtcatalog.com
“What do you do with a year’s worth of used condoms? Melt them into a tire and call it a Goodyear.”— Unknown, thoughtcatalog.com
“What do women and noodles have in common? Both wiggle when you eat them.”— Unknown, thoughtcatalog.com
“How is being in the military like getting a blowjob? The closer you get to discharge, the better you feel.”— Unknown, thoughtcatalog.com
“What did one of the prostitute’s knees say to the other? How come we spend so little time together?”— Unknown, thoughtcatalog.com
“How is tightrope walking like getting a blowjob from someone ugly? If you want to enjoy either, you absolutely can’t look down.”— Unknown, thoughtcatalog.com
“Why don’t little girls fart? They don’t get assholes ’til they’re married.”— Unknown, thoughtcatalog.com
“Why did the woman leave her husband after he spent all their money on a penis enlarger? She just couldn’t take it any longer.”— Unknown, thoughtcatalog.com