“Why did the snowman suddenly smile? He could see the snow-blower coming.”— Unknown, thoughtcatalog.com
“What does a slut say when her daughter asks how to spell ‘penis’? I wish you’d asked me last night, when it was on the tip of my tongue….”— Unknown, thoughtcatalog.com
“Why did the blonde bring a ladder to the bar? Someone told her drinks were on the house.”— Unknown, tcat.tc
“Three blondes walk into a building. You’d think at least one of them would’ve seen it.”— Unknown, tcat.tc
“What’s the secret to a happy marriage? Find a woman who can cook and clean. A woman who’s an animal in bed. A woman with lots of money. Make sure these three women never meet.”— Unknown, tcat.tc
“A magician was walking down the street and turned into a grocery store.”— Unknown, thoughtcatalog.com
“The weather here has been glorious. The pussywillows are in full bloom and though I am loath to say this, I think the little willows have been getting more pussy this year than ever before.”— Groucho Marx, amazon.com
“A girl walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a double entendre, so he gave it to her.”— Unknown, reddit.com