“Even the most hardened police officers can witness an impressive performance of faux remorse from a narcissist they’re meeting for the first time and find themselves thinking, “Aww, how noble.” You look at the same performance after years of being with them and see a snake attempting to put on a fur…”— Shahida Arabi, thoughtcatalog.com
“If, instead, you find yourself often pitying someone who consistently hurts you or other people, and who actively campaigns for your sympathy, the chances are close to 100 percent that you are dealing with a sociopath… I am sure that if the devil existed, he would want us to feel very sorry for him.”— Martha Stout, amazon.com
“Narcissists hate to fail or lose, so they will do what they can to maintain some connection if they didn't make the choice to end it…They can experience narcissistic injury when rejected by a partner and have difficulties letting it go or healing from it… they may stay connected [to exes in order to…”— Tony Ferretti, broadly.vice.com
“Regardless of what your spiritual beliefs are, let’s put them to good use. Let’s extend the idea of interconnectedness to help victims who suffer every day from the realities of verbal, emotional, physical and sexual abuse. Let’s stop letting abusers off the hook and enabling their behavior – it is…”— Shahida Arabi, thoughtcatalog.com
“Abusers want you to feel small, to make you insecure, to make you feel like you are indebted to them, or that your actions are to blame.”— Ellen Page, facebook.com
“When he comes home with pregnant knuckles, dripping blood all over the floor, I feel like a volcano of a wife. I am waiting for the tectonic plates below me to pose perfectly. I am waiting for the last straw, the last black eye or missing tooth I see before I pack my suitcase and he shows me the fro…”— Lydia Havens, freezeraypoetry.com
“When does a war end? When can I say your name and have it mean only your name and not what you left behind?”— Ocean Vuong, newyorker.com
“Emotional abuse in a relationship takes time to build. It’s slow and methodical and incessant, much like a dripping kitchen faucet.”— Jennifer Williams-Fields, everydayfeminism.com
“There are rigid gender roles in the relationship. He expects you to serve, obey and remain at home.”— Wendy Kay, yourtango.com
“He pushes for quick involvement. He comes on strong, claiming, 'I've never felt loved like this before by anyone.' You get pressured for an exclusive commitment almost immediately.”— Wendy Kay, yourtango.com
“He will be very concerned about you. He may get upset if you don’t call him back right away or if you come home late. He will say it’s because he worries about you. He will start to question who you saw, where you went, and what you were doing. He will mask his control as concern for your well-being…”— Pamela Jacobs, huffingtonpost.com
“He will want you all to himself. He will glare at other men for looking at you and question you about your male friends. You may think this jealousy is cute, or even loving — at first. But soon, he’ll make you feel guilty for spending time with friends or family. He will call or text you several tim…”— Pamela Jacobs, huffingtonpost.com
“An abuser will often use gifts and romance to distract you from other concerning behaviors, such as control and jealousy.”— Pamela Jacobs, huffingtonpost.com
“They throw objects around you. Throwing and breaking things is a violent act, even if nothing is thrown directly at you.”— Alexandra Whittaker, rd.com
“You get subtle nonverbal threats. Sometimes it can be by a look or a gesture that shows they don’t approve of what you’re doing.”— Alexandra Whittaker, rd.com
“Your self-esteem has taken a hit. If your partner consistently puts you down and doesn’t value your thoughts, he or she could damage your self-esteem.”— Alexandra Whittaker, rd.com
“Socially isolating an individual, failing to let them have visitors.”— Natasha Tracy, healthyplace.com
“Making an individual fear that they will not receive the food or care they need.”— Natasha Tracy, healthyplace.com
“He's pushy. While this might be done under the guise of "sweeping you off your feet," guys who push for too much too soon can be trouble. He should care more about your boundaries than his desires.”— Martha Brockenbrough, womenshealthmag.com