“You might initially mistake his devaluation as a normal cooling down phase from the honeymoon period of a new relationship. The difference is, this sudden Jekyll and Hyde character switch becomes a repeated pattern throughout your relationship and you continually bear witness to someone who disrespe…”— Shahida Arabi, thoughtcatalog.com
“In any type of relationship with a narcissist or sociopath, remember: their abusive, toxic and manipulative behavior is the problem – not you. Normal, healthy people do not go around deliberately harming others or manipulating them. In order to stay sane, you must seek outside support and validation…”— Shahida Arabi, thoughtcatalog.com
“The ultimate manipulation is to kill someone, and sociopathy is murderous in a psychological sense—there’s a kind of soul-murder going on.”— Martha Stout, interviewmagazine.com
“You're allowed to have normal human emotions in response to a hostile situation. While you can choose better coping methods, no one exhibits 'perfect' behavior in response to chronic mistreatment.”— Shahida Arabi, enigmatic-being.tumblr.com
“Closure is only a fairytale, a myth, a legend. The only true closure can come from within...this is a type of love story where the happy ending lies in not finding Prince Charming. Rather, it lies in the realization that he never existed at all.”— Shahida Arabi, amazon.com
“Think about it: a wealthy, successful, articulate, empathic and beautiful woman is a “shiny object” to a narcissist or sociopath who wants some eye candy on his arm or an extra source of income. The most sadistic of these predators rejoice in taking down a particularly strong target and making her f…”— Shahida Arabi, thoughtcatalog.com
“There are times we try to forgive ourselves for something we shouldn’t even have to forgive ourselves for. The traumas you experienced were not your fault. As a survivor, you didn't deserve to be abused, violated, assaulted or taken advantage of.”— Shahida Arabi, thoughtcatalog.com
“They want her to dress and behave just as they do, and to choose boyfriends, hobbies, and work that they would choose. “For her own good,” they might forbid or criticize whatever their daughter likes or wants, undermine her ability to think for herself, to know what she wants, to choose for herself,…”— Darlene Lancer, thoughtcatalog.com
“Other mothers want their daughter to look and be her best “according to them,” but cripple their daughters in the process through criticism and control. Such mothers attempt to live through their daughter, who they see as an extension of themselves.”— Darlene Lancer, thoughtcatalog.com
“People with NPD are myopic. The world revolves around them. They control and manipulate their children’s needs, feelings, and choices when they can, and take it as a personal affront deserving of punishment when they can’t. Parenting is often, “My way or the highway.” Self-involvement leads some nar…”— Darlene Lancer, thoughtcatalog.com
“Your soul knows it was not here to be abused, exploited and mistreated by anyone – no matter who they are. You are just as worthy of respect, consideration and validation as anyone you might be currently coddling, if not more.”— Shahida Arabi, thoughtcatalog.com
“I reasoned that the second man was nothing like the first, though they looked the same—swallowed my lies in tiny cups until they both drowned me, Annabel Lee in her tomb by the sounding sea.”— Shahida Arabi, thoughtcatalog.com
“INFJs are always looking for the ideal romance and a narcissist’s love-bombing initially looks like everything they’ve ever dreamed of.”— Shahida Arabi, thoughtcatalog.com
“Narcissists are masters of love-bombing us and mirroring our deepest needs and desires – down to the every last detail. They excel in creating an alluring, false persona based on what they think we want in a partner. They are talented wordsmiths, swoon-inducing smooth-talkers and faux poets who decl…”— Shahida Arabi, thoughtcatalog.com
“We can make a far better use of our creativity and imagination by using them to create the life of our dreams, rather than to concoct a fairytale out of a nightmare.”— Shahida Arabi, thoughtcatalog.com
“There are implicit rules to never unmask the toxicity of the group or its decisions. Questions are always met with ambiguous or vague answers or outright reprimands and punishment. The victim’s duty is to keep quiet, remain a scapegoat and not make a fuss about carrying out dirty work for the group.”— Shahida Arabi, thoughtcatalog.com
“To make the conspiracy all the more effective, the victim is further silenced by what makes them so special in the first place – their ability to be discerning, their sensitive nature, their compassion – are all used to paint them as unhinged should they dare to speak out.”— Shahida Arabi, thoughtcatalog.com
“Truth-tellers are commonly scapegoated in groups where there is toxicity brimming beneath the surface.”— Shahida Arabi, thoughtcatalog.com
“This example illustrates something deeply important: groups with one or more sociopaths do not target people who are incompetent. On the contrary, they target those who threaten the status quo in some way.”— Shahida Arabi, thoughtcatalog.com
“These victims may at first be idealized and love-bombed. They are subjected to praise, laser-focused attention, gifts and false promises to lure them into the group. They are “groomed” to feel like a part of the group, which often has many cult-like qualities which discourage dissent and discussion.”— Shahida Arabi, thoughtcatalog.com