You can have all the [dating] criteria and standards in the world, but what you draw to you is what you are. If you’re not abundant in love and self-esteem and self-respect and self-worth in [your heart], you’re not going to draw somebody that’s the same way.
Catalog
Iyanla Vanzant
Iyanla Vanzant (born Rhonda Eva Harris; September 13, 1953) is an American inspirational speaker, lawyer, New Thought spiritual teacher, author, life coach and television personality. She is known primarily for her books, her eponymous talk show, and her appearances on The Oprah Winfrey Show. She can currently be seen on television as the host of Iyanla: Fix My Life, and as a frequently featured guest teacher of Oprah's Lifeclass on OWN: Oprah Winfrey Network. Vanzant was born in Brooklyn, New York on September 13, 1953, as Rhonda Eva Harris. She was given the title "Iyanla", which means "great mother", after being initiated and ordained as a priestess in the Yoruba tradition (as mentioned in her television interview on the Conn Jackson show). She attended Medgar Evers College and Virginia Union University. Vanzant holds a Juris Doctor degree from the City University of New York School of Law. She currently resides in Upper Marlboro, Maryland. She is also an ordained New Thought minister. In 2000, she was named one of the "100 most influential Black Americans" by Ebony magazine, which said that "Her books, lectures and television appearances have made her a multimedia high priestess of healthy relationships." In 2012, Vanzant was listed at #7 on Watkins' Mind Body Spirit magazine list of the 100 most spiritually influential living people." In 2014, she was co-speaker in Oprah's the "Life You Want Weekend" tour, which travelled to eight cities, also featuring Deepak Chopra, Mark Nepo, Elizabeth Gilbert and Rob Bel
Each of us brings to the world unique talents, gifts, and abilities. No one can do what you do exactly the way you do it.
You do not have to do anything special to get love. The only thing that is ever required of you is to be who you are and feel good about it.
Do not measure your value and worth by external standards.
Remind yourself right now that no matter what your life looks like, you are doing the best you can. And getting better.
Never underestimate your own need, ability, or power to effect change in your life. Be willing to grow. Be willing to learn. Be willing to heal.
We are, to ourselves, the most valuable possession we have.
Instead of focusing on all the things you believe you are not, devote yourself to acknowledging the good things that you ARE.
Have the courage to be exactly who you are without apology.
Your Self is divine. Your Self is powerful. Your Self can never be altered. This is the truth about yourself.
The only thing that can diminish your power is your belief that you do not have it. Repeat this to yourself. Every day.
Until and unless you know that you are enough just the way you are, you will continue to look for more.