“Ed Bighead: Rocko, what're you doing? Rocko: [With a paddle in his hand] We're playing spank the monkey.”
“Rocko: Thanks for taking me to the doctor, Heffer. Heffer Wolfe: I wouldn't miss it for the world. These waiting rooms are real freak shows.”
“Waitress: Will there be anything else, sir? Heffer Wolfe: [referring to a pair of chopsticks] Yeah, these plastic things can't cut my burrito.”
“Rocko, Heffer Wolfe: [reading from the manual] How to Turn Off Your Suck-O-Matic. [the Suck-O-Matic sucks some pages from the manual] Rocko, Heffer Wolfe: [reading] In case Suck-O-Matic sucks instructions, see page 101. [the Suck-O-Matic sucks some more pages from the manual] Rocko, Heffer Wolfe:…”
“Heffer Wolfe: [writing Rocko's personals ad] Marsupial with big hairy chest seeking female with same. Will suck the fillings out of your teeth if you let me. I am adventurous and will try anything once. Twice if you're lucky!”
“Heffer Wolfe: Give me another double order of fries. Bartender: Sorry, pal. I think you've had enough. Heffer Wolfe: I'll tell you when I've had enough, you greasy plate jockey!”
“Rocko: [pulls up to a sign and reads it] 'Don't even think about parking here.' [starts to think] Beaver Policeman: Ahah. Caught ya. Rocko: Oh, no, officer. I was, uh, thinking of something else. Beaver Policeman: Oh, yeah? What? Rocko: Uh, well, I... Beaver Policeman: Yeah, right. Tell it to the…”
“[Filburt runs into Dr. Hutchison working at a pharmacy] Filburt Turtle: Hey, I thought you were a surgeon. Dr. Paula Hutchison: I was, but I just couldn't cut it.”
“Heffer Wolfe: [to Rocko] You're blind as a bat. Bat: Hey! Listen, bud! We bats are sick and tired of these stereotypes! We got enough problems with the whole 'vampire' shtick without being classified as visually impaired! Heffer Wolfe: Sorry. Bat: [bumps into a wall] 'Scuse me, ma'am. [Bat bumps…”
“Rocko: [after a crowd song that he missed] Why was everyone singing? Heffer: We just got a song in our hearts! Rocko: How is it you all know the words? Did you rehearse? Heffer: Yeah, every Thursday. Didn't you see the flyers?”