“We have a couple of house rules, though. You can’t use the front door. You have to climb in through the back window. No personal phone conversations. If you ever speak to me in Spanish, please use the formal ‘usted.’ And no electricity after 6:00 PM.
A couple more rules: if you ever watch a sad movie, you have to wear mascara so we can see whether or not you’ve been crying. There’s no noise allowed on Mondays. And no TV after breakfast.”
More from April Ludgate
“I really only listen to, like, German Death Reggae and Halloween sound effects records…”
“I wasn’t listening but I strongly disagree with Ann.”
“Ugh. I hate talking to people about things.”
“I declare everything you are saying is stupid.”