“I saw 'Wedding Crashers' accidentally. I bought a ticket for 'Grizzly Man' and went into the wrong theater. After an hour, I figured I was in the wrong theater but I kept waiting. Cause that's the thing about bear attacks... they come when you least expect it.”
More from Dwight Schrute
“In the end, the greatest snowball isn't a snowball at all. It's fear. Merry Christmas.”
“Michael always says, 'K-I-S-S, keep it simple, stupid.' Great advice, hurts my feelings…”
“You're a perfectly fine toilet... I'm just an extraordinary piece of crap.”
“Ryan: Did you see Saw? Dwight: Of course I see-saw. Mose and I see-saw all the time.…”