“Once I'm officially Regional Manager, my first order of business will be to demote Jim Halpert. So I will need a number two. My ideal choice? Jack Bauer. But he is unavailable. Fictional. And overqualified.”
More from Dwight Schrute
“In the end, the greatest snowball isn't a snowball at all. It's fear. Merry Christmas.”
“Michael always says, 'K-I-S-S, keep it simple, stupid.' Great advice, hurts my feelings…”
“You're a perfectly fine toilet... I'm just an extraordinary piece of crap.”
“Ryan: Did you see Saw? Dwight: Of course I see-saw. Mose and I see-saw all the time.…”