“Wipe that spaghetti sauce off your mouth, because I've got another project for you.”
More from John Mulaney
“I am scared and aroused, the chocolate and peanut butter of feelings.”
“This is capitalism. You reap what you sow.”
“I mean, sure, normally I'd go home and jerk off, eat a giant page of Doritos, fall asleep…”
“You're getting your hair pubed?”