“Ash: Forget the stupid book. Chasing that thing is only going to give you a leg cramp.
Ruby: You don't know what you're talking about.
Ash: Oh, I don't? You're the one that grew up your entire life looking for that book, and you never found it. Me on the other hand, I can't fart without tripping over that thing. And I fart a lot.”
More from Noelle Valdivia
“The purpose of sex isn’t to have an orgasm, it’s making life!”
“I meet a lot of parents. After a while, you sort of develop a sixth sense for these…”
“You're looking for something to inspire or stimulate around here? Phew, good luck. Movie…”
“My friends have been eaten by spiders.”