“My mom told me the first thing you fight about when married is the thing you'll always fight about.”
More from Oliver Goldstick
“Poor people are so cheap.”
“Who on this staff would be willing to eat something that is 15 grams of fat per serving?”
“Betty Suarez: You bought us a Christmas tree? Daniel Meade: Betty, I've thrown up in four…”
“If you're still upset, it means you still have feelings for her.”