50 Of The Funniest ‘Dead Baby Jokes’ Of All Time

“What is the difference between a dead baby and a granola bar? About 500 calories.”

— Unknown, tcat.tc

“What’s the difference between a pile of dead babies and a pile of sand? You can’t move a pile of sand with a pitchfork.”

— Unknown, tcat.tc

“Why did the dead baby cross the road? Cuz it was stapled to the chicken.”

— Unknown, tcat.tc

“What screams as it goes round and round? A baby on a spit roast.”

— Unknown, tcat.tc

“What is the difference between a deer and a baby? I don’t have a deer head mounted above my mantle.”

— Unknown, tcat.tc

“What do a dead baby’s head and a bottle cap have in common? They come off easier if you twist them.”

— Unknown, tcat.tc

“What do babies and an Etch-A-Sketch have in common? If you don’t like how it looks, you can shake it until it goes away.”

— Unknown, tcat.tc

“How many dead babies does it take to change a lightbulb? Depend on how good you are at stacking them.”

— Unknown, tcat.tc

“How many dead babies does it take to change a lightbulb? Depends how high your ceiling is.”

— Unknown, tcat.tc

“How many dead babies does it take to change a lightbulb? Couldn’t tell you. I have 50 in my basement, and the light is still out.”

— Unknown, tcat.tc

“What is the worst part about killing a baby? Getting blood on your clown suit.”

— Unknown, tcat.tc

“What is red and pink and hanging out of your dog’s mouth? Your baby’s leg.”

— Unknown, tcat.tc

“What’s the difference between 100 dead babies and a Ferrari? I don’t keep a Ferrari in my garage.”

— Unknown, tcat.tc

“What’s the difference between a dead baby and a peanut butter cup? The dead baby won’t stick to the roof of your mouth.”

— Unknown, tcat.tc

“What’s the difference between a dead baby and a felt tip marker? You don’t get second looks when you’re writing with a felt tip marker!”

— Unknown, tcat.tc

“What is grosser than ten dead babies nailed to a tree? One dead baby nailed to ten trees.”

— Unknown, tcat.tc

“What’s the difference between a bucket of gravel and a bucket of baby guts? You can’t gargle gravel.”

— Unknown, tcat.tc

“What do babies and baseballs have in common? The neighbor gets angry when you throw them through their window.”

— Unknown, tcat.tc

“What goes plop, plop, fizz, fizz? Twins in an acid bath.”

— Unknown, tcat.tc

“What’s the difference between a soccer ball and a baby? I’ve never kicked a soccer ball over 50 yards.”

— Unknown, tcat.tc