“Well, I just wanted to say to you, Larry, as a favor, please don't call me anymore. I think this was an absolute waste. This will not change my life one bit. I personally feel your show is not going to make it much longer, really. You're an annoying guy sitting there in your little funny little swea…”— Don Rickles, chicagotribune.comTagged: Larry King, insults, Annoying, Miami, Beaver
“I gotta tell you, with all the nonsense and all the jokes, I want to tell you from the bottom of my heart: Merv Griffin told me he never liked you.”— Don Rickles, chicagotribune.comTagged: Merv Griffin, Mr. T., insults
“Remember when you were governor and you used to walk over to my table? Now you're big and you're getting on my nerves?”— Don Rickles, chicagotribune.comTagged: Ronald Reagan, insults
“Make yourself at home, Frank. Hit somebody.”— Don Rickles, chicagotribune.comTagged: insults, Frank Sinatra
“Hi, dum dum….Where does it say you butt in, dummy? I'm fed up with you already, you know that? That's it, laugh it up. You're making $50 million a year and your poor parents are back in Nebraska eating locusts for dinner.”— Don Rickles, chicagotribune.comTagged: insults, Anti-Rural, Nebraska, Johnny Carson
“Marty...somebody get a phone book so you can see me. Forty million jobs in show business, I got a midget to direct me.”— Don Rickles, chicagotribune.comTagged: Martin Scorsese, Height-Shaming
“We kid about great stars such as you Bob, why? Because you're old and washed up.”— Don Rickles, chicagotribune.comTagged: insults, Age-Shaming
“They warned me what a serious guy De Niro is….They warned me not to make jokes. So the third day of shooting, I looked him straight in the face and told him: 'I can't work with you. You can't act.' The guy fell on the floor. He didn't stop laughing for 18 weeks. Scorsese fell on the floor too, but h…”— Don Rickles, chicagotribune.comTagged: Robert Deniro, insults, Casino, Martin Scorsese