“April is the best. But she’s 20. When April was born, I was already in the third grade, which means if we were friends back then, I would have been hanging out with a baby. I don’t know anything about infant care. My god, I could have killed her.”— Andy Dwyer, amazon.com
“One time when I was in high school, a guy’s mom called me and broke up with me for him. There was another time where I was on a date, and I tripped and broke my kneecap, and the guy said he wasn’t ‘feeling it,’ so he left and I waited for an ambulance. One time I was dating this guy for a while, and…”— Leslie Knope, amazon.com
“Guys love it when you can show them you’re better than they are at something they love.”— Leslie Knope, amazon.com
“Goodbye, Ann Perkins, my faithful employee. Hello, Ann Perkins, my fallopian princess.”— Chris Traeger, amazon.com
“One time I waited outside a woman’s house for five days just to show her how serious I was about wanting to drill her. Turns out, it was the wrong house. She loved the story anyway. We got to third base. Over the pants.”— Jean-Ralphio, amazon.com
“A key component of having high self-esteem is trusting yourself to make the right choices while also realizing you are well equipped to cope should things go awry.”— Sabrina Alexis, amazon.com
“Confident women know what they will and will not accept and don’t allow themselves to be pressured or guilted into doing things they don’t want to do.”— Sabrina Alexis, amazon.com
“When you present your needs and boundaries like this, the right man will realize he’d be a fool to lose you. The right man will step up to the plate and ASK YOU for the commitment you’re after…and he’ll swell up thinking it was his idea all along and that he’s ‘won’ you.”— Christian Carter, eharmony.com
“Men are simply not attracted to women who try and convince them to be in a more serious relationship with them. Instead, men are deeply and naturally attracted to women who live their lives and have certain ‘standards’ when it comes to interacting with men. And one of the unspoken standards that is…”— Christian Carter, eharmony.com
“I mean, if the relationship can't survive the long term, why on earth would it be worth my time and energy for the short term?”— Nicholas Sparks, amazon.com
“Even if a guy is relationship ready, if you bring up on date three that you’re ready for a relationship he’ll likely question whether you really want to be in a relationship with HIM or if you’re ready for a relationship with anyone. He’s going to wonder how, after two dinners and one museum trip, y…”— Marni Battista, eharmony.com
“One day you're gonna open your heart. And it isn't gonna be to make me happy. It'll be for you. Because love is gonna bring you joy.”— Greg Kinnear, Steve Miller, amazon.com
“I was in love with her. I could feel it, deep in the soft, chewy caramel center of my being.”— Ernest Cline, amazon.com
“Talking to girls was out of the question. To me, they were like some exotic alien species, both beautiful and terrifying.”— Ernest Cline, amazon.com
“So I'm supposed to believe you're one of those mythical guys who only cares about a woman's personality, and not about the package it comes in?”— Ernest Cline, amazon.com
“Rachel: ‘Go tell him he’s cute, what’s the worst that could happen?’ Monica: ‘He could hear me.’”— Rachel Green, Monica Geller, amazon.com
“Phoebe: 'You name one woman that you broke up with for a real reason.' Chandler: 'Maureen Rosilla.' Ross: ''Cause she doesn’t hate Yanni’ is not a real reason.'”— Chandler Bing, Ross Geller, Phoebe Buffay, amazon.com
“Just so you know, it's not that common, it doesn't happen to every guy, and it is a big deal!”— Rachel Green, amazon.com