“Another day, another dollar. I've really got to renegotiate my contract.”— Stephen Colbert, twitter.com
“They're putting a woman on the $10 bill. And if they make it your grandma she won't even have to sign your birthday card.”— Stephen Colbert, twitter.com
“Another rough day on Wall Street. Good thing all of my savings are tied up in Greek municipal bonds!”— Stephen Colbert, twitter.com
“Picking up a few extra bucks by playing myself at Madame Tussauds. Stop by and say, 'Hi!'”— Stephen Colbert, twitter.com
“If Twitter’s stock price goes any lower, I’m concerned that none of us are ever going to get paid for this.”— Stephen Colbert, twitter.com
“Staying in from time to time is fine, but when it’s every single night and all you do is have sex, he’s using you for just that. Don’t fall for the lack of money excuse. There are lots of free date ideas.”— Christy Rasmussen, herinterest.com
“He may have bragged about how much money he makes and how much he spends, but when it comes time to pay, he always has an excuse for not taking the bill. He shouldn’t necessarily foot the bill for all your dates; the whole ‘the man should pay’ notion isn’t really fair. It’s fine to trade off paying…”— Deepika Singhania, newlovetimes.com
“If you’re a girl with a lot of money in the purse, you always need to be cautious about the kind of guys you date. Almost always, more than half the guys you date would be after your money than anything else.”— Gerry Sanders, lovepanky.com
“Dates are pizza at your place. Men who are interested in courting you and getting to know you - want to be out in public, doing things with you, whether it’s going to a gallery opening or a chic new restaurant for a romantic dinner. Men who are only interested in sex don’t want to invest time or mon…”— Larry Schwimmer, huffingtonpost.com
“Financial stability. This may be terribly unromantic, but with that being said, his finances are extremely important and is one of the most practical things to take note of when deciding if he’s the one you should marry.”— Lianne Choo, lovepanky.com
“Most cheating men will need an untraceable way to pay for things: gifts, meals, hotels, trips, etc. Reloadable credit cards, PayPal accounts, and eBay purchases are all great ways to hide large or frequent transactions. Definitely investigate large, random transfers or cash withdrawals.”— Charles J. Orlando, yourtango.com
“My love of coffee, green juice, and booze sure has LIQUIDated my bank account.* *don't even play like that wasn't perfect.”— Mamrie Hart, twitter.com
“I always appreciate the offer to split the check, even though I never allow it. If we end up grabbing drinks later and a woman insists on paying, I really like that a lot. It shows me that she's genuinely interested in spending time with me as opposed to wanting to be wined and dined regardless of w…”— Lauren Otis, cosmopolitan.com
“Use your old pre-paid gift cards (like American Express and Visa) to sign up for trial offers without actually getting charged.”— Unknown, 1000lifehacks.com
“The effect of his scientific budget planning was that he felt at once triumphantly wealthy and perilously poor.”— Sinclair Lewis, amazon.com
“If you want to know how God feels about money look at whom she gives it to.”— Anne Lamott, amazon.com
“The only good thing I've ever noticed about money, the only positive aspect of an otherwise pretty vulgar commodity, is that you can use it to buy things.”— Hugh Laurie, books.google.com
“Buy Experiences Not Goods. Want to buy happiness? Then spend your hard-earned cash on experiences.”— Richard Wiseman, amazon.com