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Stephen Colbert

60 quotesTelevision Actor · Born May 13, 1964 · United States Of America · Male

Stephen Tyrone Colbert (/koʊlˈbɛər/, né: /ˈkoʊlbərt/; born May 13, 1964) is an American comedian, television host, and author. Colbert has hosted The Late Show with Stephen Colbert, a late-night television talk show on CBS, since September 8, 2015. Colbert originally studied to be a dramatic actor, but became interested in improvisational theatre while attending Northwestern University, where he met Second City director Del Close. Colbert first performed professionally as an understudy for Steve Carell at Second City Chicago, where his troupe mates included Paul Dinello and Amy Sedaris, comedians with whom he developed the sketch comedy series, Exit 57. He wrote and performed on the short-lived Dana Carvey Show before collaborating with Sedaris and Dinello again on the cult television series Strangers with Candy. He gained considerable attention for his role on the latter as closeted gay history teacher Chuck Noblet. His work as a correspondent on Comedy Central's news-parody series The Daily Show gained him wide recognition. In 2005, he left The Daily Show to host a spin-off series, The Colbert Report. Following The Daily Show's news-parody concept, The Colbert Report was a parody of personality-driven political opinion shows including The O'Reilly Factor, in which he portrayed a caricatured version of conservative political pundits. The series became one of Comedy Central's highest-rated series, earning Colbert an invitation to perform as featured entertainer at the White House Correspondents' Association Dinner in 200

All Money (5)food (4)Election (3)Holidays (3)President (3)Technology (3)Women (2)Work (2)Earth (2)Election 2016 Jokes (2)Politics (2)Songs (2)Funny (2)Reading (2)Speech (2)

From “via twitter.com”

Such a great weekend -- went out to the beach and binge-watched the sunset.

Sunset Nature binge watched

If I was on a desert island and could only have one book, I'd choose "Atlas Shrugged." Because that's 1,088 pieces of toilet paper.

Books Reading Island

If you know what you're doing, every axe can be a battle-axe.

axe battle axe weapon

Man, who'd have thought it'd be June already? Anyone with a calendar, I guess. I've got to start thinking these tweets through better.

June calendar Time

Does anyone know where we can buy one of those "100 Days Without A Workplace Accident" signs? Ours has a lot of dried blood on it.

Blood Accidents Work

Another day, another dollar. I've really got to renegotiate my contract.

Money Work paycheck

I can't wait for the next Mad Max movies: Bargaining Max, Depression Max, and finally, Acceptance Max.

mad max Anger Depression bargaining

Will I understand "Jurassic World" if I didn't see "Triassic World?"

jurassic world

Fun Fact! Techno music got its name because it is technocally music.

techno Music Songs

They say if you want to get something done, give it to a busy person. Still, The Rock hasn't even started cleaning out my basement.

the rock celebs Busy

I hate it when I get a song stuck in my head -- but it's better than getting it stuck in my liver.

Music Songs Funny

I want this tweet to go viral. So imagine a kitten getting hit in the nuts with a leaked photo of the iPhone 7.

Viral kitten iPhone

The new Late Show will have so many surprises for you! For me, too. I tend to nod off during meetings.

Surprises Meetings Naps

They're putting a woman on the $10 bill. And if they make it your grandma she won't even have to sign your birthday card.

Money Women birthday

My dog used to bring me the newspaper, but now he just forwards me links.

Dogs Pets newspaper Internet

U-S-A! S-O-C-C-E-R! C-O-N-G-R-A-T-U-L-A-T-I-O-N-S O-N T-H-E B-I-G W-I-N! Y-O-U A-R-E A-N I-N-S-P-I-R-A-T-I-O-N T-O U-S A-L-L! #LSSC

soccer Inspirational Sports

BP is paying $18.7 bil for their Deepwater Horizon oil spill—that comes out to roughly $18.7 bil for every planet they're destroying.

oil spill Earth Destruction

Taking my kids to see 'Magic Mike XXL' tonight. Don't know what it's about, but my kids are crazy about magic!

magic mike Magic Movies Parenting

Hey Neil deGrasse Tyson, I’m sick of you hitting Pluto below the Kuiper Belt. Come here and pick on someone in your own orbit!

neil degrasse tyson planets pluto celebs

Something's wrong with my iPad! Should I wash it again?

iPad electronics Technology

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