“It’s imperative that the guy who’s going to be penetrating me is trustworthy and gentle, and not an asshole. Assholes don’t mix with my asshole. I’m going to be getting in sexual positions where my body will look fleshy and revolting. It will seem like I’ve magically gained 20 pounds somewhere for n…”— Ryan O'Connell, thoughtcatalog.com
“Men love to be trusted. They love to hear us say yes to their desires and lay our pleasure in their hands. It feeds into their primal instinct to protect and naturally dominate. Women want to give, so handing over the ‘ I trust you with my a-card’ is something rare and novel. Trust is a gift to both…”— Belle Aria, thoughtcatalog.com
“Every woman has a little wild streak in them and a desire to be a bad girl. Who wants to always be the goody two shoes? There’s something alluring and mysterious about the dark side, dangerous and edgy. If I was any good at acting, I’d want to play your basic bad bitch because it just so much more f…”— Belle Aria, thoughtcatalog.com
“Vaginal sex makes babies and anal sex obviously doesn’t. If you don’t want to have babies right now, birth control is 99% effective with condoms or contraceptives, which honestly, can slightly decrease the amount of pleasure in sex. So the back door cures all of that since your man can come in there…”— Belle Aria, thoughtcatalog.com
“The best way to start anal is when you’re on your stomach and he’s kind of on top of you, like laying on top of you and sliding it in. Probably the most relaxed position to be in. It helps if he kisses your neck, ears, caresses your head. It helps it feel good as soon as the initial ‘ouch’ is over.”— Madison Moore, thoughtcatalog.com
“Push. While this may seem counter-intuitive, bearing down relaxes your muscles. Try it. When you press in or squeeze, your muscles tighten, when you bear down muscles ease. If you’re almost but not quite there, before giving up, try to push against the object entering your bottom. Pushing is another…”— Tess Danesi, blogher.com
“Experiment with different positions. In seated position, you can try lowering yourself onto the cock and going at your own pace. If you’re in a doggie position, back up onto the cock. Feeling in control is another great way to alleviate anxiety and relax.”— Tess Danesi, blogher.com
“Be horny. It helps to be really excited, so get ready with tons of foreplay. Whether you go down on each other, engage in some sensual massage or touching, it’s all good as long as it turns you on. Also, try stimulating the area surrounding the anus before diving in with fingers, toys or penises. Th…”— Tess Danesi, blogher.com
“The minimum preparation for enjoying external anal play is a regular bowel movement followed by complete external cleansing. Washing the external anal area with warm soap and water is often enough to allow you to feel at ease.”— Charlotte Mia Rose, pleasuremechanics.com
“Unlike the vagina, the rectum is not a straight tube, but has a subtle curve to it. These curves are part of the reason that anal penetration should be slow and gentle, especially at first. Each person's rectum and its curves are unique, and it is best to feel your way inside the rectum slowly, foll…”— Tristan Taormino, alternet.org
“Put a vibrator on your clitoris if you’re a girl. If you’re a guy, you should have your lover stimulating your penis, your balls, or whatever feels good... Work the parts of your body that are tried and true; that you know feel good. Those areas are very often neglected.”— Susan Block, alternet.org
“A partner who is pushy, not tuned in to your pleasure, or clumsy is probably not the right one to explore anal with, unless they devote themselves to learning more about being a good lover.”— Carol Queen, alternet.org
“Unlike other body parts that become ooey-gooey all on their own, the anus is not a self-lubricating organ. But due to the wonders of modern science, this need not be a problem. Lube—whether water, silicone, or flaxseed based—solves that problem for us. And be sure to go slow, communicate throughout,…”— Patrick Howell O'Neill, dailydot.com
“In addition to the stigma associated with seeking rump pleasure, there is the myth that anal sex is—nay—must be painful. While dipping one’s toes (or fingers, penis, or sex toy) into the anal waters can involve momentary discomfort, pain should not be a prerequisite for experiencing the joys of anal…”— Patrick Howell O'Neill, dailydot.com
“Use a dildo or vibrator on yourself while he’s having anal sex with you. Although some women can orgasm from anal alone, most times, they need other forms of stimulation to climax. Using a dildo or a vibrator on yourself while having anal sex is a great way to ensure you and your man are both having…”— Sean Jameson, elitedaily.com
“This anal sex tip has you pre-stretching your anus by loosening it up with a butt plug. You can put in the butt plug yourself, or he can put it in for you. Butt plugs both help you feel the pleasures of anal sex, and help relax your muscles before the act. You need to use lube with butt plugs just a…”— Sean Jameson, elitedaily.com
“Although you don’t need to clean inside your anus, too, this anal sex tip is something you might want to do. You can use an enema with warm (not hot) water to clean inside. You would keep filling your rectum with water and then passing it into the toilet until the water comes out clean.”— Sean Jameson, elitedaily.com
“You don't start out with the penis. Work your way up, stimulating the outside with a finger or tongue and then slowly use your finger to enter the anus. And then once she get used to that, you can go on to bigger and better things.”— Jill Provost, yourtango.com
“For those just starting out, I think getting on all fours might be a little too intense, because she doesn't have as much control. Lying on your side in the spooning position won't allow penetration that's as deep. It's also a more relaxing position. When you become more comfortable, the doggie is t…”— Jill Provost, yourtango.com
“The most important thing is to get really turned on and comfortable. Your anus is surrounded by a ring of muscle called the anal sphincter, which is designed to keep in feces. Your sphincter needs to be relaxed to allow something to pass through it. So do whatever works for you to get yourself feeli…”— Emma Kaywin, bustle.com