“Wanna know what kills more police than bullets and liquor? Boredom. They just can't handle that shit. You keep it boring, String. You keep it dead fucking boring.”— Dennis Lehane, Joseph 'Proposition Joe' Stewart, Robert F. Chew, imdb.com
“He hit us when he was drunk, things were thrown, we had to run for our lives. We spent many nights, weekends, hidden in DHSS rooms. I remember being woken in the night, mum screaming, and rushing down the street in our pyjamas to a neighbour's to wait for the police.”— Gordon Ramsay, telegraph.co.uk
“Of course I’m dangerous. I’m police. I could do terrible things to people... with impunity.”— Nic Pizzolatto, Rust Cohle, Matthew McConaughey, imdb.com
“I didn't commit a crime. I didn't rape anybody. I didn't assault anybody. I didn't get a DUI. I mean, my God, there are celebrities that fucking kill people.”— Joyce Chen, rollingstone.com
“The police recently complimented me on my driving... They left a note on my windscreen which stated Parking Fine”— Suraidu, reddit.com
“My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard and I’m like this is private property and if you don’t leave I will call the police.”— Unknown, tcat.tc
“Two men broke into a drugstore and stole all the Viagra. The police better be on the lookout for two hardened criminals.”— Unknown, tcat.tc
“Surely the fact that a uniformed police officer is wearing his hair below his collar will make him no less identifiable as a policeman.”— Thurgood Marshall, thurgoodmarshall.com
“Crime is going down everywhere but in the New York City Police Department.”— Al Sharpton, amazon.com
“Though there were over 200 policemen standing around, none of them made a move to grab him.”— Al Sharpton, en.wikiquote.org
“Hard feelings? What do you know about hard feelings? You ever have a man die in your arms? You ever kill somebody?”— Larry Charles, Lieutenant Bookman, the "Library Cop", Philip Baker Hall, imdb.com
“There was a shooting at a computer hardware shop. Police say it was a drive buy”— lepusfelix, reddit.com
“Why did the police officer apprehend the insomniac? They were resisting a rest.”— Infinityexile, reddit.com
“What's the police's favorite gaming console? WII U WII U WII U WII U WII U WII U”— TheSitron, reddit.com
“Arrest is an instantaneous, shattering thrust, expulsion, somersault from one state into another.”— Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn, archive.org
“I told two twins their matching outfits are cute... "Did your mom buy you matching clothes?" I asked politely. To which they answered, "We're not twins and could we see your license and registration please.”— Rusty_Shakleford69, reddit.com
“A police recruit was asked during the exam, "What would you do if you had to arrest your own mother? He answered, "Call for backup."”— PineappleMcGee, reddit.com