I will say it as many times as it takes for you to believe it: You are not a burden.
Catalog
Chloë Frayne
Maybe I’m not what you want; I’m just what distracts you until you get it. But I hope you still want me when you aren’t lonely.
I think I might always be jealous of the way sunlight touches your skin.
I imagine you in every empty seat I sit beside.
What a mess I have made with nothing but an idea that I am not enough.
I don’t want anything from you. Just everything with you.
we touch, with no idea of holding and I say it is okay but there is forever on my breath; there is always on my hands and I know you are just a moment.
Today I forgive myself for wanting what never wanted me. Today I let you go.
And we are all just fighting to survive a world where I miss you doesn’t mean I’m coming back and I love you doesn’t mean I’ll stay.
You don’t get to say you miss me if you could have had me this whole time but chose not to.
and I add your name to the list of things I survived this year. note it: barely.
you only really wanted me when your life felt empty. and I wanted you in rush hour traffic. a room full of people. even through all the noise.
You called me yours and for just a moment, I forgot you weren’t mine.
I thought of all the things I wanted to say to you and I swallowed a sea.
I think it would be almost disrespectful to myself if I let you stay.