“Rocko: Thanks for taking me to the doctor, Heffer. Heffer Wolfe: I wouldn't miss it for the world. These waiting rooms are real freak shows.”
“Waitress: Will there be anything else, sir? Heffer Wolfe: [referring to a pair of chopsticks] Yeah, these plastic things can't cut my burrito.”
“Rocko: We don't need some hoity-toity health club to stay in shape, eh, Heff? Heffer Wolfe: No way, man! Care for another slice of pizza? Rocko: I'm feeling the burn! Heffer Wolfe: Yeah, you should blow on it first. The cheese is hot.”
“Heffer Wolfe: [writing Rocko's personals ad] Marsupial with big hairy chest seeking female with same. Will suck the fillings out of your teeth if you let me. I am adventurous and will try anything once. Twice if you're lucky!”
“Heffer Wolfe: Give me another double order of fries. Bartender: Sorry, pal. I think you've had enough. Heffer Wolfe: I'll tell you when I've had enough, you greasy plate jockey!”
“Heffer Wolfe: Hey, Crod, you wanna get some ice cream? Crod: [a caveman frozen in ice] Crod don't like ice cream. Heffer Wolfe: Oh, I knew you were a burger man.”
“Heffer Wolfe: [to Rocko] You're blind as a bat. Bat: Hey! Listen, bud! We bats are sick and tired of these stereotypes! We got enough problems with the whole 'vampire' shtick without being classified as visually impaired! Heffer Wolfe: Sorry. Bat: [bumps into a wall] 'Scuse me, ma'am. [Bat bumps…”
“Heffer Wolfe: Hey, Rock, you wanna move to France? Rocko: Not really. Heffer Wolfe: Naw. Me neither.”
“Rocko: [referring to Filburt's diary] Look, Heff, if I let you see one page, then will you be satisfied? Heffer Wolfe: Yes. I'll be satisfied. Heffer Wolfe: [Heffer starts reading aloud] 'The Earth Log of Filburt Shellbach. I am an alien. For our evil plan to take over this puny planet, see next…”