“Elliot: You know I kinda had a date last night?
J.D.: Really?
Elliot: Yeah, a guy on the bus fell asleep on me and drooled on my shoulder.
J.D.: ...You slut.”
More from Mike Schwartz
“Barbie why did you order this test? For the love of God, are you a real doctor or a doctor…”
“Danni: Do you even enjoy spending time with me? J.D.: 'Enjoy' is such a strong word. I...…”
“There comes a time when every man needs to make a choice, whether it's a professional…”
“J.D.: So he has a cute butt. Everyone has a cute butt. I have a cute butt. Carla: You…”