"I rang up my local swimming baths. I said: ‘Is that the loca..." — Tim Vine

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I rang up my local swimming baths. I said: ‘Is that the local swimming baths?’ He said: ‘It depends where you’re calling from.’

— Tim Vine

50 of Tim Vine’s most ingenious jokes and one-liners

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I went in to a pet shop. I said, ‘Can I buy a goldfish?’ The guy said, ‘Do you want an…




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