“Jay: I 100% fuck my pillow. First, I make a slit. Not too long, careful as to not rip the edges, making what I call 'the husband stitch'. Then, I take two Ziploc bags and I fill them with Amy's Organic Lentil Soup, which I microwave to exactly 98. 6 degrees not enough to burn you, but just enough to feel warm and inviting. Then I place them in the slit of the pillow. There's another slit in the back, but that's only for my birthday.

Maury: This kid might be a genius.”