“My dad says when you take into account maternity leave, you do get equal pay.”Tagged: Stupid, Stupid Jay, Ironic
“She was your friend, then she was your lover, now she's your enemy.”Tagged: Breaking Up, Exes, When It Goes Bad With Your Ex
“My bros and I are developing a shitstorm worth of extreme sports, like 'breakball,' 'golf punch,' and 'peep-kour.'”Tagged: Golf Punch, Peep Kour, Breakball
“Jay: I 100% fuck my pillow. First, I make a slit. Not too long, careful as to not rip the edges, making what I call 'the husband stitch'. Then, I take two Ziploc bags and I fill them with Amy's Organic Lentil Soup, which I microwave to exactly 98. 6 degrees not enough to burn you, but just enough to…”Tagged: pillows, This Kid Is A Genius
“I crave emotional intimacy. Because my parents have a no-touch policy with me. So I don't really feel human contact at all.”Tagged: No-Touch Policy