“Wearing perfume makes you smell nice, unless you're wearing a perfume called "Le Skunk, De Poop".”— Lori Beth Denberg, amazon.comTagged: Teen Nick, Nick
“It's nice to help your mom clean the kitchen. It's not nice to hit foreign people over the head with farm animals.”— Lori Beth Denberg, amazon.comTagged: Teen Nick, All That
“It's not nice to buy a gallon of blue paint, wait till your mom falls asleep, paint her, and then say, "What's the matter, Mama? Feeling blue?”— Lori Beth Denberg, amazon.comTagged: Teen Nick, Nick
“If you have a pizza delivered, it's nice to tip the pizza man a dollar. It's not nice to say, "Hey, thanks for the pizza...could you help me put it in my pants?”— Lori Beth Denberg, amazon.comTagged: Teen Nick, Nick
“It's rude to talk with your mouth full. It's even ruder to talk with a mouthful of baby squirrels.”— Lori Beth Denberg, amazon.comTagged: Nick, Teen Nick, Nickelodeon
“It's no fun to go to the dentist, especially if your dentist pushed you down a flight of stairs.”— Lori Beth Denberg, amazon.comTagged: Nickelodeon, Teen Nick, Nick
“You are what you eat. I am thirteen tacos and a stick of butter.”— Lori Beth Denberg, amazon.comTagged: Nickelodeon, Teen Nick, Nick
“If you're on a first date, it's a bad idea to say, "So, what's the biggest loogie you've ever hocked up?”— Lori Beth Denberg, amazon.comTagged: Teen Nick, Nickelodeon
“It's rude to walk up to an old person and say, "Hey, has your face always looked like that, or have you just been underwater for the last twenty years?”— Lori Beth Denberg, amazon.comTagged: All That, Teen Nick, Nick, Nickelodeon
“To get your teacher's attention, it's a bad idea to scream " Hey look over here you freakish animal”— Lori Beth Denberg, amazon.comTagged: Nickelodeon, Teen Nick
“If your phone rings, pick it up. If your butt rings, see a doctor.”— Lori Beth Denberg, amazon.comTagged: Nick, Nickelodeon, Teen Nick
“If it looks bad, smells bad, and tastes bad, then it might be... this old burrito!”— Lori Beth Denberg, amazon.comTagged: Nickelodeon, Nick, Teen Nick
“It's easy to milk a cow. It's weird to milk a toothless hippie named Maurice.”— Lori Beth Denberg, amazon.comTagged: Nick, Teen Nick
“Girls don't like it when boys take their sandwich and run away screaming, 'Hey, look who's got your sandwich now.”— Lori Beth Denberg, amazon.comTagged: Nick, Teen Nick
“Never kick a man when he's down. Just look at him and scream, 'Hey, get up, you down on the ground weirdo.”— Lori Beth Denberg, amazon.comTagged: Nick, Teen Nick
“If your bra is too tight, it's uncomfortable. If you're a boy and your bra is too tight, I'm uncomfortable.”— Lori Beth Denberg, amazon.comTagged: Nickelodeon, Nick, Teen Nick
“Girls, it's a bad idea to fill your bra with water and goldfish and then tell people you've invented the 'Double Cup Aquarium.”— Lori Beth Denberg, amazon.comTagged: Nickelodeon, Teen Nick, Nick
“All is fair in love and war. All is smelly in a closet full of baboons.”— Lori Beth Denberg, amazon.comTagged: Nick, Teen Nick
“Revenge is sweet- not as sweet as 10 pounds of sugar.”— Lori Beth Denberg, amazon.comTagged: Nick, Nickelodeon, Teen Nick