Episode

The Unger Games

by Dave Foley, Matthew Perry, Neil Simon, Thomas Lennon, Wendell Pierce

When Oscar feels threatened by Felix’s surprising performance on the softball field and basketball court, they agree to a decathlon to determine which one of them is the better athlete.

(6 total)

Characters

Matthew Perry (8)Neil Simon (6)Thomas Lennon (4)Felix Unger (4)Oscar Madison (2)

“Felix: Well today I take a stand for every boy that was limber and laughed at. Emily: Maybe don't do a ballet pose when you say that? Felix: It's just the way my body rests.”

— Matthew Perry, Neil Simon, Felix Unger, Thomas Lennon, imdb.com

Tagged: Effeminate, Ballet

“Oscar: I didn't just win, I beat you like a dirty rug. Felix: Okay, except nobody cleans rugs like that anymore because we don't live on The Waltons.”

— Matthew Perry, Neil Simon, Felix Unger, Thomas Lennon, imdb.com

Tagged: cards, poker, The Waltons

“Felix: You just wanted to beat me so you could feel superior. Well guess what sir, you have poked the dragon! And you would know what that means if you'd watched even one Game of Thrones with me. Oscar: I don't need to watch the show to know that it's bad to poke the dragon.”

— Matthew Perry, Neil Simon, Felix Unger, Thomas Lennon, imdb.com

Tagged: poke the dragon, Game of Thrones

“Oscar: And you're welcome to play on my softball team any time, you're quite a bunter. Felix: Since we're being honest, I did not know what bunting was, I was swinging as hard as I could.”

— Matthew Perry, Neil Simon, Oscar Madison, Matthew Perry, imdb.com

Tagged: softball, bunting

“Murph, you probably hear this all the time, but carry me to the bedroom!”

— Matthew Perry, Neil Simon, Oscar Madison, Matthew Perry, imdb.com

Tagged: ravish me

“Murph, lift with your legs or you could literally burst your balls.”

— Matthew Perry, Neil Simon, Felix Unger, Thomas Lennon, imdb.com

Tagged: Weightlifting, burst your balls