You know Hartman, goodie-two-shoes is fidgeting around like a one-legged cat trying to bury shit on a frozen pond, until old Seth fixes him a couple of pink poontang specials. You know, that crazy drink that I fix for stewardesses? Two shots out of that and Hartman is shot to shit, freaked out. I me…
— Frank Yablans, Ted Kotcheff, Peter Gent, Nancy Dowd, Rich Eustis, Seth Maxwell, Mac Davis, imdb.com
I'm not a bum; just homeless.
— Michael Bortman, Allison Burnett, Champ, Samuel L Jackson, imdb.com
Shooter McGavin: [after buying grandma's house in an auction] You're in big trouble though, pal. I eat pieces of shit like you for breakfast! Happy Gilmore: [laughing] You eat pieces of shit for breakfast? Shooter McGavin: [long pause] No!
— Tim Herlihy, Adam Sandler, Happy Gilmore, Adam Sandler, imdb.com
Texas Longhorn Player: I'm gonna kick your black ass back to Africa, boy! Jack Buckley: Oh yeah? Too bad I'm from Philly.
— Charles Leavitt, Jack Buckley, Omar Benson Miller, imdb.com
Win one for the Gipper!
Look, Harry, you wanna enter him, you enter him. But you make sure you do it under your name...not mine. I'm not gonna be humiliated in front of all the top owner in the country.
Sun don't shine on the same dog's ass every day, but, mister you ain't seen a ray of light since you got here.
Presently ranked 119th in the world. Sport is cruel. Now I know it doesn't sound too bad. Four million tennis players in the world, and I'm 119th. But what that really means is this—118 guys out there are faster, stronger, better, and younger. And it gets you thinking.
— Adam Brooks, Jennifer Flackett, Mark Levin, Peter Colt, Paul Bettany, imdb.com
Being perfect is not about that scoreboard out there. It's not about winning. It's about you and your relationship with yourself, your family and your friends. Being perfect is about being able to look your friends in the eye and know that you didn't let them down because you told them the truth. An…
— David Aaron Cohen, Peter Berg, Coach Gary Gaines, Billy Bob Thornton, imdb.com
I tell them you say they no good fighters...and that their mothers have sex with mules.
— Glenn A. Bruce, Mark DiSalle, Jean Claude Van Damme, Xian Chow, Dennis Chan, imdb.com
Harry Hogge: Cole, you're wandering all over the track! Cole Trickle: Yeah, well this son of a bitch just slammed into me. Harry Hogge: No, no, he didn't slam you, he didn't bump you, he didn't nudge you... he rubbed you. And rubbin, son, is racin'.
Well, let me just quote the late-great Colonel Sanders, who said…’I’m too drunk to taste this chicken.’
[to Stump] The desire for glory is not a sin.
Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure aroun…
— Mark Schwahn, John Gatins, Timo Cruz, Rick Gonzalez, imdb.com
A moment of pain is worth a lifetime of glory.
— Ethan Coen, Joel Coen, Richard LaGravenese, William Nicholson, Pete Zamperini, Alex Russell, imdb.com
When the Washington Sentinels left the stadium that date, there was no ticker-tape parade, no endorsement deals for sneakers or soda pop, or breakfast cereal. Just a locker to be cleaned out, and a ride home to catch. But what they didn't know, was that their lives had been changed forever because t…
Jimmy: I see you got FAT! Chazz: I see you still look like a fifteen-year-old girl, but not hot!
I know you. You know you. And I know you know that I know you.
— Rawson Marshall Thurber, White Goodman, Ben Stiller, imdb.com
Bill Murray: It's 'cause I'm white, isn't it? Michael Jordan: No. Larry's white, so what? Bill Murray: Larry's not white. Larry's clear.
— Leo Benvenuti, Steve Rudnick, Timothy Harris, Herschel Weingrod, Himself, A. C. Green, imdb.com
How is it that the ultimate prize in the most macho sport ever invented is a piece of jewelry?
— Scott Rothman, Rajiv Joseph, Ali, Jennifer Garner, imdb.com
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