“You see, that is the sad, sorry, terrible thing about sarcasm. It’s really funny.”— Brandon Sanderson, amazon.com
“The universe may not always play fair, but at least it’s got a hell of a sense of humor.”— Candace Bushnell,, amazon.com
“...there is only one thing that a philosopher can be relied on to do...Well, a philosopher can always contradict other philosophers.”— William James, theatlantic.com
“I’ve never been lonely. I like myself. I’m the best form of entertainment I have.”— Charles Bukowski, amazon.com
“And I have one of those very loud, stupid laughs. I mean if I ever sat behind myself in a movie or something, I’d probably lean over and tell myself to please shut up.”— J. D. Salinger, amazon.com
“Once upon a time there was a serious, well-behaved young black cat. It belonged to a kind old lady who assured me that no other cat could compare with Kitty . . . She called it 'Kitty,' but Kitty called herself 'Miss Catherine St Quintin.”— Beatrix Potter, amazon.com
“This is a Tale about a tail — a tail that belonged to a little red squirrel, and his name was Nutkin.”— Beatrix Potter, amazon.com
“Saw Oscar Wilde and his wife just going into the Fine Arts to see the Holman Hunt. He is not peculiar as far as I noticed, rather a fine looking gentleman, but inclined to stoutness. The lady was strangely dressed, but I did not know her in time to see well.”— Beatrix Potter, amazon.com
“Don't go into Mr. McGregor's garden: your father had an accident there; he was put in a pie by Mrs. McGregor.”— Beatrix Potter, amazon.com
“THIS is a fierce bad Rabbit; look at his savage whiskers, and his claws and his turned-up tail. THIS is a nice gentle Rabbit. His mother has given him a carrot.”— Beatrix Potter, amazon.com
“It is said that the effect of eating too much lettuce is 'soporific.' I have never felt sleepy after eating lettuces; but then I am not a rabbit.”— Beatrix Potter, amazon.com
“She let out a laugh, and then she put her hand over her mouth, like she was angry at herself for forgetting her sadness.”— Jonathan Safran Foer, amazon.com
“I'm not a robot; I have a personality and I have emotions. I have a humorous side to me and an angry side to me.”— Jeff Gordon, post-gazette.com
“Outsiders develop humor as a defense; why do you think most comedians are gay or Jewish?”— Paul Lynde, books.google.com
“If you didn’t grow up like I did then you don’t know, and if you don’t know it’s probably better you don’t judge.”— Junot Dìaz, amazon.com
“If you think nobody cares if you’re alive, try missing a couple of car payments.”— Earl Wilson, amazon.com