“small boob privilege is so real like…. bralettes… underboob tattoos… going braless?? not looking hyper sexual at all times ???? running comfortably? i could go on”— averagefairy, averagefairy.tumblr.com
“In case you were wondering, WebMD has no cures for 'My dog just dragged her butt across my whole backyard & made eye contact w/ me.'”— Grace Helbig, twitter.com
“Take a selfie it'll last long-wait delete that one my eyebrows look fat take another.”— Grace Helbig, twitter.com
“Don’t finish every text with ‘hahaha,’ ‘hehe’ or ‘lol.’ This is NOT sexy.”— Alexis Kleinman, huffingtonpost.com
“girl: he cheated on me me: then break up with him girl: but- me: bye”— kawaiigod, haylxyy.tumblr.com
“If you’re someone who has issues with food, New Orleans isn’t the place for you. When traveling here, you have to just accept that you’re going to unleash your inner Kirstie Alley and gain weight.”— Ryan O'Connell, thoughtcatalog.com
“Maybe all that wine is an Instagram filter for our own lives, so we don’t see how sallow and cracked they’ve become.”— Kristi Coulter, vox.com
“Dogs are for people who need to be worshipped as gods. Cats are for people who are strong enough to put up with gods standing on their chests at 5:00 AM and demanding a sacrifice.”— Anonymous, facebook.com
“you can drink all the pinepple juice in the world your pussy is still gonna smell and taste like pussy.”— krisdinee, baebiigurl.tumblr.com
“pussy is supposed to smell like pussy!!! not fruit, water, fresh laundry, good childhood memories or anything else ok???”— krisdinee, baebiigurl.tumblr.com
“I love crossing the street while cars are turning cuz it’s like wow either you hit me and I die, you hit me and I sue you, or you don’t hit me and I get to cross the street either way I win.”— hacksign, lennonsjohn.tumblr.com
“Does your cat ever meow at you in a particularly rude way and you’re like EXCUSE me do NOT talk to me like this i am your m o t h e r.”— Anonymous, youcuntmakeitwetter.tumblr.com