“Randy Taylor: [referring to himself and Brad] Billy's mom thinks we're perfect little gentlemen. Tim Taylor: Billy's mom thought she saw Elvis yesterday at the gas station.”Tagged: delusional
“Mark Taylor: Are you gonna make Brad and Randy say they're sorry? Tim Taylor: Well, you have two choices: You either make 'em apologize, or we could get even. Mark Taylor: Get even! Tim Taylor: That's my boy!”Tagged: Apologize, get even
“Tonight, when I'm cookin' that chili, I'll cut up this cauliflower, and we'll tell them we've got rabbit brains in there.”Tagged: chili, cauliflower, rabbit brains, Absurd, Gross
“Jill: We're keeping score. Tim: I thought you didn't want to keep score. Jill: Oh, is the great big, bad bowling man afraid his itty-bitty wife is going to beat him? Tim: Is the itty-bitty wife afraid the big, bad bowling man is going to leave her in the PARKING LOT?”Tagged: arguments, keeping score, itty-bitty
“Brad Taylor: I don't have any lines. Randy Taylor: That's because you blew it, you stooge. He was trying out for one of the wise men, and he said they were carrying gold and Frankenstein.”Tagged: frankenstein, Frankincense