“Howard: What are you going to wear to Ralph's costume party?
Richie: I haven't decided yet.
Marion: How about something like Donald Duck?
Richie: Oh, Mom!
Marion: What's wrong with Donald Duck?
Joanie: Mom, it's hard to neck with a beak.”
More from Jack Winter
“Marion: Your father once even sent me a five-pound box of candy on Valentine's Day…”
“Richie: Why did you let me kiss you if you didn't want to go steady? Cindy: Because…”
“What's the world coming to when you can't bribe your best friend?”
“Stop it, I'm going to lose my lust!”