I Had a Nice Time And Other Lies...: How to find love & sh*t like that

“You know how advice is. You only want it if it agrees with what you wanted to do anyway.”

— John Steinbeck, amazon.com

“I’m not a stop along the way. I’m a destination.”

— The. I Had a Nice Time And Other Lies.. Betches, amazon.com

“We accept the love we think we deserve.”

— Stephen Chbosky, amazon.com

“Men marry women with the hope they will never change. Women marry men with the hope they will change. Invariably they are both disappointed.”

— Albert Einstein, amazon.com

“Love is a fire. But whether it is going to warm your heart or burn down your house, you can never tell.”

— Joan Crawford, amazon.com

“What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.”

— Kelly Clarkson, amazon.com

“Pour yourself a drink, put on some lipstick, and pull yourself together.”

— Elizabeth Taylor, amazon.com

“Facebook relationship statuses are for losers.”

— Anon, amazon.com

“A rich man doesn’t need to tell you he’s rich.”

— Neil Strauss, amazon.com

“When you really don’t like a guy, they’re all over you, and as soon as you act like you like them, they’re no longer interested.”

— Beyoncé, amazon.com

“Men don’t realize that if we’re sleeping with them on the first date, we’re probably not interested in seeing them again either.”

— Chelsea Handler, amazon.com

“Don’t ever date a man that takes more selfies than you.”

— The. I Had a Nice Time And Other Lies.. Betches, amazon.com

“It was once said that a person’s eyes are the windows to their soul. That was before people had cell phones.”

— Blair Waldorf, amazon.com

“She who texts first loses.”

— The. I Had a Nice Time And Other Lies.. Betches, amazon.com

“Never make someone a priority when all you are to them is an option.”

— Maya Angelou, amazon.com

“Guys don’t care what you do. A guy could be talking to two women at a party, and one is beautiful and just won the Nobel Prize in Literature, and the other is just slightly hotter and like, has a job interview at H& M in the morning. And 10 times out of 10, you know how that’s going to go.”

— Amy Schumer, amazon.com

“If you don’t have a valentine, hang out with your girlfriends, don’t go looking for someone. When it’s right, they’ll come to you.”

— Carmen Electra, amazon.com

“Power is being told you’re not loved and not being destroyed by it.”

— Madonna, amazon.com

“My mom always used to say, ‘You can’t say I love you before you can say I.’ And I think that sort of makes sense.”

— Mindy Kaling, amazon.com

“Be yourself. Everyone else is already taken.”

— Oscar Wilde, amazon.com