“Lucy Ricardo: Fred, you've given me an idea. I'm going to give Ricky scalp treatments. And they'll be so drastic he'll be glad to forget the whole thing. Fred Mertz: It won't work... Lucy Ricardo: Why not? Fred Mertz: Nothing has ever been invented that a man won't try if he thinks he can get his ha…”— Jess Oppenheimer, Lucy Ricardo, Lucille Ball, imdb.com
“All you people with hair think you're so damn superior! You have no idea what it's like. You ever look down in the bottom of your tub and see a fist fulla hair? How'd you like to start your day with that?”— Peter Mehlman, Toupee Salesman, Basil Hoffman, imdb.com