Uncle Jesse: You know why tornadoes and blondes are so much alike? Luke Duke: No. Uncle Jesse: At first, there’s a lot of sucking and blowing, and then you lose your house.
— John O'Brien, Jonathan L. Davis, Uncle Jesse Duke, Willie Nelson, imdb.com
Uncle Jesse: You know why tornadoes and blondes are so much alike? Luke Duke: No. Uncle Jesse: At first, there’s a lot of sucking and blowing, and then you lose your house.
— John O'Brien, Jonathan L. Davis, Uncle Jesse Duke, Willie Nelson, imdb.com
Q: Why did the blonde buy a brown cow? A: To get chocolate milk.
Why did the blonde jump off of the cliff? She was depressed and wished to end her life.
How do you get a blonde to marry you? Tell her she’s pregnant.
How did the blonde die ice-fishing? She was hit by the Zamboni.
Two blondes fell down a hole. One said, ‘It’s dark in here, isn’t it?’ The other blonde was dead so she could not respond.
Why’d the blonde get fired from the M&M factory? She kept throwing out all the Ws.
Why couldn’t the blonde dial 911? She couldn’t find the eleven.
Why did the blonde put lipstick on her forehead? She was desperately trying to make up her mind.
How do you confuse a blonde? You don’t. They’re born that way.
Why do blondes hold their hands tightly over their ears? Because they’re desperately trying to hold in a thought.
What do blondes do when their laptop freezes? Microwave them.
What’s the difference between a pregnant blonde and a lightbulb? You can unscrew a lightbulb.
Why do blondes make awful bank robbers? Because they tie up the safe and blow the guards.
Why did the blonde bring a ladder to the bar? Someone told her drinks were on the house.
What do blondes and dog shit have in common? The older they get, the easier it is to pick them up.
Why did the blonde put condoms on her ears? To avoid getting hearing AIDS.
How do you confuse a blonde? Put her in a circle and tell her to sit in the corner.
Three blondes walk into a building. You’d think at least one of them would’ve seen it.
What do you call a blonde with an actual brain? A golden retriever.
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